FAQ's

My Fit Brain

These entries submitted our community members & Visitors. The author's views are entirely his or her own and may not reflect the views of My Fit Brain.

No, you shouldn't ! If one person in the house you feel doesn't like you, it never says to leave home, see the other two members ( your son and grandchild) need you. You are the biggest support to them, Running away is never the solution, solving the problem while being there is the biggest victory. I sympathize as your wife is not with you in the remaining journey of life but, accept the reality nobody can love you as she did And you not not alone, go out make friends, try to be friends of people like you, may be they are looking for your friendship. My advices would be: 1. Try to indulge yourself in spirituality, enchanting hymns, connectivity, me -time is necessary. Its the only power that can give you satisfaction 2. Change bit of your lifestyle, opt for morning walk, yoga sessions, make friends there. 3. As you are retired, you can join any n.g.o or some cultural meetings or groups.your knowledge will be great help to the youngsters. 4. Seek help from counselor , they can motivate you. 5. Spend more time with your grandchild, his love will give you energy. Don't loose help, you are important.


My Fit Brain

Hello dear!!! Dont be demotivated , that was just your first interview, Try on again, you will be best. I can understand that you faced problem out there but I'm happy ,that you want to work on it. Your efforts only shows you are not zero! "Gir Kar uthne wale ko hi hero kehte h " Issues facing 1. Communication issues 2. Feeling nervous and shaky 3.loosing confidence 4. Feeling motivated to appear for interview. Causes: As you mentioned that you were not so much friendly with in your childhood and had selected relatives to talk. Although you talk in comfort zone, but never interacted to new people outside. Keeping yourself in a network made you feel comfortable but now going and answering people in authority making you feel anxious. Trust me, a single job interview is not the end of world. Tingling sensation, sweating and not able to say anything are symptoms of Social Anxiety. My tips for you are as follows: 1. For fighting anxiety and be confident in interview,first do practice Start with your trusted friend or sibling, tell them to be an interviewer and ask questions , Try to improve and be natural. 2. Try to go to the venue before time,prepare yourself according to the surroundings , talk to the employees and reception people or co applicants there and then , things will be better. 3. Stay calm: don't worry, this is just an interview,don't judge yourself on this pattern, feel normal as your teacher is asking you a question. 4. Don't look for negative signals: sometimes even they are signalling you that you are saying right answer but you took it wrong, don't look for their face expression, stay collected in present If you feel nervous, pause for a second and again start with slow tone. 5. Dont think negative, interviewers are not there to judge you, they are there to judge your abilities. Be strong on your abilities and qualifications. 6. Its usual: pls Understand, every second person feel this,it's not unusual. Work on it,practice, you will be better. 7. Take proper sleep a night before interview,don't stress yourself much, practice meditation in morning,avoid caffeine drinks, dress up well, take blessing from family before leaving. Even you can accompany any friend of yours to job interview initially. 8. You can Google out some questions according to your job field,write answers for them on paper and practice it Mirror talk is the best option. 9. For confidence building and fighting social anxiety: A. Exposure: go out,make new friends,talk to them. Start with social media and then jump to meetings. B . Appraise: if you made conversation nd getting better reply , reward yourself. C. Don't avoid:go out,escaping will increase problem, Make friend.. Don't worry what people around you think,just try to be yourself. D don't fear but fight, it's basically a hormone rush,nothing's is gonna hurt you, fight you will be better. E. Take help from therapist, if problem increasing , CBT THERAPY WILL help you to go better with this issue. F. Go for new hobby,making friend there and expanding your skills are important Personality development and communication improvement courses are recommended. (As you feel problem in communication) Lastly,practice motivation, self motivate by saying: 'I prepared well,I can do, will try to give my best shot,they might select me" Work on,you will get your best job. Trust on God and try to improve your shortcomings.


My Fit Brain

Hello sir! We are so happy to know the beautiful bond you and your mother had. Your mother was really brave who decided to be in the relationship of marriage and diversify herself in your parenting. I can understand the pain you went after losing the biggest support of your life. As the problems you are feeling are : 1. Feeling of loneliness and depression by loss of mother 2 . History of traumatic childhood ( father- mother tortures) 3. Feeling of she's here with you which ultimately gave you feeling that she's in you 4. No one is understanding the way you feel these days. Dear, you have developed the dissociation in your personality, I know you were feeling happy by wearing clothes of your mom because you feel she's with you but physical preoccupation may be disturbed you. Your life history may be disturbed you this way that you developed split- personality . My advices for you is: 1. Book your appointment for the psychiatrist, he might suggest some Medicines, follow the regimen. 2. Watch you tube videos / documentary illustrating the science behind death and spirits 3. Book appointment with psychologist, they will help to evacuate thoughts and feelings. 4. Individual Therapies will help you to accept the reality. 5. Try to take time for park , yoga and walks. 6. Meditation will work wonders. 7. Accept the reality of death and life , you can read holy books like bhagvat geeta and Ramayana. Take right help!!! Things will go better.


My Fit Brain

Hello dear, I felt so happy to hear that you are doing efforts for your family, you are the best son and brother anyone can get. You are a good example to the society. I can empathise that In these responsibilities load,you are not able to give time to yourself . But, don't feel negative that you can never get your own family (wife and kids), the family you are caring is your family too. The problem is ,you are not giving time to yourself, Nobody ever is going give you time in life saying go and enjoy, you yourself have to take it out. Problems facing : 1. Burdened under responsibility 2. Feeling lonely and frustrated. 3. No friends and love support basically personal life and time. 4. Reduced hope for having good personal future. I can say ,you are tired of working.you need to take some Me time out. I know it's important, to earn bread and butter but , dying inside, will not let you enjoy food . My suggestions for you as follows. 1. Patience: as your sister is studying, don't loose hope ,once she will start earning, she will be an supporting hand to you. 2. Plan a trip:plan a small trip to some peaceful area like temples or lakes or hill station and take break. Either you can plan to visit your relatives and school friend. Spend time , get refreshed and start new. 3. Take some Me time: See what your hobbies, do it . If you feel you can't do it daily: do it once a fortnight A.take half the day of leave for yourself, go meet your old friend, sit with them, interact . B. Don't work even on paid holidays, to have more money, enjoy it's for you, relax. Go for oil message at home from your sister hand , enjoy mumma' s hand food, relive moments with father. C. Start enjoying morning walk, spending time with nature give pleasure and peace to soul. D. Go with flow,discuss with family your need for life partner,they will understand it, moreover, she will be add on support to you in your journey of life. E. Put your mental health on priority: if you feel frustrated, go sleep for some time,take proper naps and food. F. Ask for help from your family members in small chores of home,there's no harm in it. G try to say No,if you feel Burdened, do lil but do whole heartedly. 3. Meditate: you can practice it early morning and as well as in office hours to maintain internal peace and happiness. Che k on hold with breathing and enjoy blissfullness. 4. Activate your social media profiles, chit chat , make friends , interact. 5. Set goals of life: don't move in the race of earning money, set goals and meet them patiently. 6. Take help from counsellor , in case you feel negative and stressed. You are important to your family but yourself first. They are dependent on you is not problem but a proud for you.


My Fit Brain

I can understand you,don't be depressed , with the right guidance you will able to fight on with your habit of day dreaming to a good level. Issues you are facing now: 1. Day dreaming about project given to you and visualizing the same. 2. Due to being involved,not able to complete work on time leading to critism and being hurt. 3. Feeling hopeless and depressed as no-one is understand what is the reason for the same . Dear, according to psychology, day dreaming is the defence mechanism, people do it to escape from painful and difficult situation into the world of their visualization, where they feel good. Although , it's not bad but when it's start hampering your schedule, it needs to be monitored. My suggestions for you would be as follows: The purpose is to use day dream reduction technique, stay focused and engage in activities attentively 1. Understand why you do it: Do you do to escape problem, to plan things,to feel good or pass time? Access the pattern first. 2. Buy a notebook or diary, make a list how many times a day you day dream like : 21. Nov; 5 times for 30 mins approx. 22 Nov: 6 times Try to reduce the times first and then frequency. Possibly you can set an alarm for very 1 hour in office to distract you and drink water. If someone ask, you can say it's my water intake reminder . Apps are available for the same. Purpose is to enhance awareness. 3. On the first page of diary,write the consequence if you day dream,so whenever you open it , you will able to see the warning, the habit will leave you soon. 4. Plan less: have a schedule and stick to it completely,try to take physical work more than intellectual. 5. Reward yourself: it's basically the learned process, positive reinforcement will definitely boost your power to fight, if someday,your frequency became less,reward yourself with shopping.( I hope you like it) 6. Get up: if in the office you feel drifting,get up go for the small walk in cafeteria, or do some stretching or saying hi!!! to a colleague. You can listen to songs and video.Try to be interactive. 8. As you mentioned,you use to imagine about project given to you by company, As soon as you get project,take paper and write down so that you know the time limit and your plans , how to do it . 9. Take proper sleep,you can write night dairy too. Taking healthy diet in a day. 10:Try to find new hobbies like joining gym,treckking, aerobics and make yourself engaged by busy schedule. 11. Consider help by psychologist and friend support system for reduction techniques. 12. One of the probable cause be work load may be, don't stress,as long as you work,project may come and go,work less but work perfectly. Lastly,I want to say you Dear,try to judge yourself , and don't take stress,if someone else (boss) say wrong , it will not decide your capabilities Work hard! Reach on heights .


My Fit Brain

Hello dear! I can empathise with the bitter experience you had In your past, but I'm happy that you learned the life skills that made you positive. I can understand the social rejection you are facing and leading you towards feeling bad about past incidents but moving on,is very much important. Issues: 1. Social rejection 2. Feeling of suffocation nd stressed 3. Not able to overcome the negative memories. 4. Feeling of crying. 5. Want to start new life but can't. First of all,I appraise that you are working in N.G.O and studied socially despite of such ups and downs in life. And your this effort of working in N.G.O will definitely make you proud of yourself and people around you some day. My tips for you would be : 1 Understand, there are some things in life you can't change,so it's better to avoid them Society is a dynamic group , you can't give them explanation,neither they will Understand,avoiding is the best tool. I know it's difficult for now, but rather indulge yourself in productive work so that your respect starts to gain. 2. Recognize the memory and formulate positive one: A. Take a piece of paper and write down all the memories that life gave you happy. Keep the paper in your vallet, see that whenever people say you bad. 3. Try to live in present:try to do meditation nd yoga,rejuvinate the inner self ,practice mindfulness by repeating positive statement " I have to do better in life's 4. Consider that the time you spent in N.G.o made you mature, powerful about living the life . It made you a positive and a independent you. 5. Keep building happy memories: go out on trip,join new hobby , paint draw learn,dance , jump, make yourself as happy as you can. 6. Try to keep yourself busy with the works in N.G.O , people round there. You can also start writing blog,if you feel so,or writing diary.. People on social media,gets inspired to know the stories of people who overcome the downs In life. 7. Keep patience and believe in god: time is the best wound healer and God has the ultimate power of giving strength. Spend time with the energy 8. Seek help; get yourself open to your friend,relative , share what you are going through. Or you can opt for professional help by talking to counsellor and opting for therapies like CBT THERAPY TO make you strong. 9. You can shift your town or workplace if can be possible but victory is only achieved when you change your image living the same situation. 10. Accept what happened was a mere nightmare,I have to be what I'm. Don't go stress or cry. Things will be fine soon.


My Fit Brain

Dear, Life only means ups and downs, moreover, god gives difficulties in life to those who believes has power to live upto them.

YOU ARE POWERFUL!

I can really sympathize with you by reading all the situations you faced since your childhood If it was someone else, they must have lost hope , You are really a STRONG WOMAN.

As the current problems you mentioned:

1. History of disturbed events made you fearful.

2. You feel lonely due to loss of love support in your life.

3. Worried, as you feel more problem will make you weak.

4. Lost trust in people as you hurt once.

5. Loss of confidence as you were victim of bullying at work.

6.  Negative thoughts of past and future denies you to live in present.

 

Don't worry, these situation made you so strong for future that you will set a strong example for your daughter.

And remember, every great lady has the history of so much downs like you have be it  IndraGandhi or mother teresa .

YOU WILL SHINE.

So, my piece of advice for you will be:

1. Don't loose hope: you have your whole life standing, invest your energy in positivity like meditation, self improvement.

2. Book your appointment with counselors nearby and go for motivational sessions.

3. Art of living courses will also take you out of answers or dilemma.

4. Join english improvement classes to cover up what you are weak in.

Real life heros are those who corrects their problem as they come.

5. Take proper nutritious food, you will have a strong future lady. Eat to support yourself.

6. Every second person is getting hurt in relationships these day , don't linger , MOVE ON, wait for that right one who will take you in the dream land with him.

If you got hurt once, it doesn't means you will not try again.

7. Don't lose self confidence, you join motivation enhancement classes at wellness centres nearby.

8. You can also go for CBT THERAPY to ventilate your negatives out.

9. Don't feel insecure, develop trust in god, thoZe who don't have anyone, that power is always inside.

Divert in religious activities.

Make friends, socialise, interact. 

Once again I'm telling, YOU ARE ONE OF YOUR KIND.

10. Past shouldn't hamper your present, try to make your future, the best place for your kids to live in. 

 

I know, you will follow the tips and set an inspirational message to the world around.

Be STRONG.


My Fit Brain

Hello Sir, thanks for sharing your query with us.I want to appreciate your courage,of coming out with the real desires of your life.

Yes, it really takes courage to speak up for your inner self and the goals you want to achieve in your life. People take whole life to understand what they exactly want to do and live only doing what they are doing.

 But Responsibility is important too in life,may be you felt bad but your wife was not wrong in letting you do the job.

 Understand,it's not necessary that you can't do what you with to do with your routine work.

I can Understand,you opted this job after sudden death of your mother,and doing from 8 years .Don't take it forgranted, it's the prominent source of income for your family. 

 

Relieve your hobby with the job 

 My suggestions for you as follows:

1. Take time out:

 Despite of your job timings,take     time out and start going for learning music as you like,the one you like.

Horn your skills , know what you are good at first.

 Which music skill you are good and pursue in future?

 Know first.

2. Before convincing others about what soothe You,show them the skills you have.

 Then you don't need to quit job,income is important,do it side by side.

3. If in future,you feel you are doing good.

You can pursue career as music teacher or open music academy or teach your college students music.

4. Don't be depressed,even in college time,utilize your free period,visit music faculty in college and seek interest there. This will keep you lively and give reason to your job.

5. If you feel burdened, you can talk to the counsellor and discuss what you feel.

There are many people who work and pursue their interest too.

So,don't be depressed! Work for your happiness and then after knowing what you can Do! Quitting is better.


My Fit Brain

Hello dear!!! You are a brave powerpuff girl>, <career oriented>, <adventurous@gmail.com>, <professional.

 As the problem you mentioned that your parents want you to get married to a family>, <where your fiancee ad his family will not support your career dreams>, <Moreover@gmail.com>, <your parents give you excuse that you are not got placed and you are unsuccessful management person.

 

No>, <this is probably can't be the reason for blocking your professional life but understand>, <this is your right age of getting married and they are doing it as they have too>, <they have given you ample time to live your Me live. 

Telling you for marriage>, <is their responsibility not pushing force as they have given you free environment before marriage.

 My advices for you as follow:

1. Convey: atleast talk to your family>, <let them know what you want to do>, <what you want your future family to be like.

 Every parent want daughters happiness>, <explain them that you want to do job.

2. Talk to your fiancee: as he's also professional>, <plan a meeting>, <tell about your hobbies and interests and let him understand you 

Even if nothing's work out>, <convince him to work you from home.

3. You are not saying 'no': 

Convince your parents that you are not saying no for marriage but the environment and liberties I want>, <the decides marital family will not allow.

 They can look for another family.

4. Talk to them in polite manner>, <aim should not to win but to convey>, <you can use emotional Angel too but don't panic and shout.

They are your own.

Try to tell them the benefit of working lady>, <financial partner.

5. Even if nothing sort out>, <don't feel bad>, <sometimes a new person will change the perspective of family . 

 May be some time later>, <you have to get married>, <keep yourself positive.

6. You can also consult counsellor nearby and evacuate the fear of being trapped. Go with flow in life>,  <they may block your physical needs but you can contact your friends emotio>, sometimes it was not as bad as expected.

 May be they will allow later on.

7. Lastly

Hello dear!!! You are a brave powerpuff girl>, <career oriented>, <adventurous@gmail.com>, <professional.

 As the problem you mentioned that your parents want you to get married to a family>, <where your fiancee ad his family will not support your career dreams>, <Moreover@gmail.com>, <your parents give you excuse that you are not got placed and you are unsuccessful management person.

 

No>, <this is probably can't be the reason for blocking your professional life but understand>, <this is your right age of getting married and they are doing it as they have too>, <they have given you ample time to live your Me live. 

Telling you for marriage>, <is their responsibility not pushing force as they have given you free environment before marriage.

 My advices for you as follow:

1. Convey: atleast talk to your family>, <let them know what you want to do>, <what you want your future family to be like.

 Every parent want daughters happiness>, <explain them that you want to do job.

2. Talk to your fiancee: as he's also professional>, <plan a meeting>, <tell about your hobbies and interests and let him understand you 

Even if nothing's work out>, <convince him to work you from home.

3. You are not saying 'no': 

Convince your parents that you are not saying no for marriage but the environment and liberties I want>, <the decides marital family will not allow.

 They can look for another family.

4. Talk to them in polite manner>, <aim should not to win but to convey>, <you can use emotional Angel too but don't panic and shout.

They are your own.

Try to tell them the benefit of working lady>, <financial partner.

5. Even if nothing sort out>, <don't feel bad>, <sometimes a new person will change the perspective of family . 

 May be some time later>, <you have to get married>, <keep yourself positive.

6. You can also consult counsellor nearby and evacuate the fear of being trapped. Go with flow in life>,  <they may block your physical needs but you can contact your friends emotio>, sometimes it was not as bad as expected.

 May be they will allow later on.

7. Lastly


My Fit Brain

Hello ma'am!! Greetings of the day. You are a great example of sacrifice and hardwork.

The way you fulfilled your responsibility is commendable.

You broke the taboo" that girls can't manage responsibility and family " . As of now

I can understand that loneliness is what makes you feel empty.

Problems you are facing 

1.feeling stressed and depressed specially at night.

2. Lost trust in relationship as there is  History of getting hurt in relationship.

3. Feeling of quitting life as there's nothing to look upon.

 

The probable cause is you never lived with yourself, you always fulfilled what responsibilities and relations told you to do , but when you effectively , lived for yourself???

  

What are your hobbies,what you liked to do,what's your interest in life ,your aims ,objectives.

Quest is to find answer for all these ??

 My suggestions for you as follows:

1. Today,make a list of things you always wished to do when you were young.

We all have wishes,which we never got opportunity to do as your life has something else decided for us.

 Make a list and fufill them

2. Make support group:

start making friends through social media,then your office staff and also make a list of friends from school and friends to whom you can contact. 

 Talk to them, find your happiness.

3. Join new hobbies; after office, you can join hobbies  like dance class, aerobics , art and craft the one you feel makes your interest.

4. Get on ,open your arms to the love in your life,everyone is different,you need someone to be around you , your kids, your husband.

You can make profile on online portals ,involve your siblings too later on.

5. Give me time to yourself:go out shopping,catch out with night parties,get together

Give yourself a reason to live and enjoy.

6. You can also join an N.G.O if you feel so like cry foundation or rotract that takes less of your time and involve in helping school kids.this give you pleasure and satisfaction.

7. You can also start giving coaching classes to small kids

At home,this will also give you target to achieve and fill aims in life.

8. When alone can do meditation, night time bath, deep breathing exercises , some stretching and warm milk before going to bed will give Healthy sleep.

9. In case of help,you can also talk to couselor nearby your locations to find a friend within.

 Understand, you cannot be alone in life if you have your God and your aims with you.

 Keep that light alive 

 You are best daughter.

 All the best !!!


My Fit Brain

Hello dear!!! You will achieve heights in life,may be you were not Rabbit who ran fast , but a tortoise who's running slow as to win in life.

In this story,if tortoise have blamed his species of being heavy and habit of running slow , he might have lost the race in between.

If you have decided to achieve the targeted success, don't worry who's first and last, keep moving is important.

  Son, understand two things clearly:

1. The things which are in your destiny at particular time, you will not get it on time only.

"Waqt se pehle , kisi ko kuch ni milta."

2. Success is not characterizes by how many attempts made and whts your age.

 

Remember these things always, you will never get demotivated in life.

 Now, coming to the equality you mentioned here, you know it's an global issue, many who deserves it or not, are enjoying it!!!

Promise yourself and study hard: as soon as you will get night post in civil exams, try to  strict laws who deserves reservation or not.

Help the coming generations so that they don't get demotivated as you are going.

 So , chill up and work again.

I know you will do it !!!

 

》Some of my advices for you :

1. Don't look for people around you, who got selected or not, Don't burn your positivity into jealously, MARK YOUR OWN JOURNEY.

2.  Dont go depresses, keep motivating quotes hanging on your walls or study tables.

Our country need you son.

3. Give youself the relaxation time, meditate by sitting calm and listening your own hartbeart and concentrating  on your breaths,you I'll feel pace inside.

 Do it for 10 mins sitting or sleeping twice a day.

4. Read stories of people, who made to toughest exams of their life,it's said that " the one who got failures Initially, can only know the taste of success"

 Be proud, you are one of them.

5.interact with friends confidently, give time to parents and study focussed, this time you will surely clear it out .

 

All the best 


My Fit Brain

Hello dear, your passion towards our country needs big applause , may every young men has this patriotism as you have either not for joining army but yes, respect for countries and Indian soldiers.

 I'm also happy to know how disciplined you are in your life.

Perfect factor, taking care of study as well as physical health.

 Great Son, you surely want to fulfil your dad's dream and now yours.

 

I can understand your mother's  situation, she atleast lost the support  person  in her life and now you want to dedicate your life to country, thts why she might be worried , depressed and panicky. Support from a Son, it's a biggest power a mother has. Please  do go with her smile in your decision by following the suggestions:

1. Sit with your mother in calm room like Temple or so, convey her mom, may be if you will not like , il do some other work but my conscience will always make me feel that my country is calling me. 

Wait for her decision.

2. Rather telling her , what you feel for your country, make her strong for accepting it. For that you can let her know the honour certificate she will get, the respect among relatives , good salary and pension, house etc.

Make her know the advantages by making her strong.

3. Is there is anyone your mother always listen to, mama or some uncle, convey your message to them, may be they can help. Do it in polite manner.

4. In need of help, you can take her to the counselor nearby and let her evacuate the fears she has related to you and life, family counselling session  will be beneficial. 

5. In case, if your mother doesn't convince and it's effecting her health, I advice you to change your path of achieving your goal towards country, 

She might be concerned for being alone away from you or some mishappening.

If you want to help your country, and your mother needs you too, do something for country sitting  here, join some n.g.o, help poor , work against women trafficking,  corruption, sanitation , pending court cases etc.

Even joining police department , will serve the same purpose.

》 remember, responsibility towards your mother is on priority than responsibility  towards motherland 

 

Keep that light if patriotism towards INDIA burning, path can be anything, think again.

Then convince your mother.

She loves you!!

All the best 


My Fit Brain