Friends stand up for you. When others try to hurt you emotionally or physically, they do everything they can to make sure you stay safe. They don't care who is trying to harm you; they will defend you anytime, anywhere.
Having a true friend is motivation; we stay happy and creative with our life. Stress and depression would take no place in our lives, but we are tensed when our friends are stressed. We should help a friend in stress and make an effort to overcome stress. We all try to find out the problems and solve those as soon as possible.
Sometimes we use some wrong words for their behaviour at that time, and those words create more problems, and we hurt them.
There are some tips from DR. NEHA MEHTA, CONSULTANT PSYCHOLOGIST, HISAR, HARYANA, on Stress management in Hindi.
What are those statements which you should not apply -
The matter can be related to your friend's family, result, pear group, relationship, upset after broke up. We should not use some statements like- You may be crazy. That is not a problem dear, or I do not think you are tensed.
Why are you crying? Why are you blaming yourself? Stop it, friend. Sorry, I have to tell you that you are taking too much time for this ordinary matter. It is not a serious case, the way you are saying. It would help if you did not cry for this.
When we use those statements, our friend may be disappointed. Maybe she is feeling hopeless in that situation. Friends are always available for positive support, but our wrong words have hurt her feelings.
If you genuinely want to help your friend, you can follow these tips-
Try to understand that your friend is in trouble. Make sure that you are available for him and tell him about that. You can use those words which may give him strength or little happiness in that situation.
You can say, I know you are in trouble. Maybe I cannot solve your problems. I know, perhaps I am not the right person to listen to your concerns. But I am always there for you, no matter what is happening.
You can tell me about your problems. If you can share that, you can feel a little more comfortable with your questions. When you think, I am not with you, call me. I am always with you, dear. All your friends love you. I care for you, dear, do not be upset. Do not cry like this.
Anything that you want to do, I am with you. If your mood becomes uplifted, I will do it for you. Please be happy. You are too important to me.
Do not go away from time. Time is an essential event in our life. Try to face those problems and find out the solutions. It would help if you thought about reality. It is crucial to be realistic to grow up and solve those problems.
Do not be alert for past problems or negative comments made for you by someone, which words were hurting you and what he or she will make statements for you in the future.
Time is a dynamic process, time does not stay for anyone or any reason, and time always keeps going towards the future. Do not think that one person has hurt you before; it means he or she will ever hurt you.
You should analyse your problems. Think about what happened and what might be the reason behind that. I am always with you.
Help a friend in stress and make an effort to overcome stress. Here is stress management in Hindi by DR. NEHA MEHTA
We should use some positive statements. The statements may give him or her strength to think about solutions. Having a friend is a very precious thing in your life. It is said that- money, the property is not earned by you, it comes to you. Then what do you achieve? You earn friendship.
Just for depression or stress, you can lose your friend. You have to solve those matters or be with him or her. Ask him about the problem and help him. Think about the reason why a person hurt your friend. Now you try to understand the logic or why those emotions that person has thrown to your friend. Tell her to think that way.
Yes, we do not give those solutions as a counsellor or psychologist. We present those solutions from our experience.
Support your friend, instead of blaming him
Kindly don't blame him or her. Don't say that I was told that a person is not the right person for you.
We should tell our friends. Try to stop blaming others for your situation or others' negative statements for you. Always remember you cannot handle others; you only can feel. Look at yourself, dear. You are the best.
Be available always for your friend
When you are available, you can solve many problems. Be with your friend. It is a big deal. Take care of her or his. Always try to solve your friends' problems. Make him happy.
You should listen to them, their problems, and try to solve those problems. You should become a good listener, and think about the solutions. Tell your friend to understand those matters and think about the answer herself.
Sunlight is always available for flowers, and you are still available for your friend. Plants are there, where the sunlight is. Flowers go towards the sunlight. Be with your friend.
If you think you cannot solve those matters, you can take advice from a counsellor with your friend. If he doesn’t want to go, you should go and take some advice. Do not think your friend will become mad; anyone can go to a counsellor for advice. It is not a bad or secret thing.
Nowadays, it is quite familiar. You can take online counselling sessions. In that way, it will be secret to you and your friend. It will help you. Please don't force your friend, be available to him. Convince him to solve his problems himself.