Making Rules for Children

Tanishka Pathak
Child Behaviour

28 Nov 2020
Making Rules for Children

Usually, Parents Ask - Why My Child Is Rebellious? 

Do you get irritated at your child? Do you get angry at your child with his rebellious child? You should not react in a negative way when they get rebellious in front of you. If you lose calm, then it will have a negative effect on your child.  Being angry and negative on your can make them against you. Rebellious nature can be shown by children of many ages. Like he can be of age 3, 5,7, or maybe a teenager. Rebellious nature has nothing to do with the age.  Being disrespectful, being sneaky are the signs of rebellious nature. You should try to understand the rebellious nature of your child. If you get angry with them, say them negative words, slap them, then it is not the solution to any problem. Don’t make them feel guilty or bad if they show this kind of behavior.

How to know your child is rebellious in nature -  

1) If your child does not want to listen to you.

2) If your child ignores your sayings.

3) If your child do whatever he wants to do.

4) If your child gives you an answer in an irritating way.

5) Frequent mood swings. 

6) Low self-esteem issues

Child rebellion can be disastrous especially if it is a teenage rebellion but with your wisdom and calmness, you can mold the behavior of your child.

Why children show this kind of behavior?

At teenage, there occur a lot of hormonal, physical changes, psychological changes. 

1) Independence – Children at teenagers want a sort of independence in their life. They don’t want to interfere in their personal life.

2) Show off in friend circle - Children at this age, usually want to show off in their friend circle. They want to show their friends how cool they are. 

3) Need a separate identification - Teenagers want a separate identification. They want society to know them with their names, with their personality.

4) Don’t want to accept themselves – Children at this age copy other famous personalities, they want themselves to be like them, dress up like them. 

5) Purpose of their life - Children at this age want the purpose of his life, what they want to become? 

6) Complex- Children or teenagers of this age, have a habit of comparison with their friends. They always become better than their friends, but it creates issues of self-hatred. 

What should you do if your child is a rebellion?

Firstly, you need to understand, your child is not the first child who is saying this kind of behavior. So, just calm down and try to understand their thinking and problems they are facing. If you show, angry behaviors they will feel you are against them and you never try to understand them. Stop judging them and be a responsible parent.

We know, when your child was a kid, he used to share every minute details with you but now he is a teenager, he needs some space. He may not like sharing everything with you now so maybe you will find his behavioral changes strange but try to understand them. Don’t overreact and don’t get disappointed by them. 

Always be kind to them as at this age they feel peer pressure. They might feel the issues of anxiety, panic attacks, and depression. 

What should parents do in this situation 

 Here are the tips by Dr. Neha Mehta (My Fit Brain)

1) Don’t be an over disciplined parent- A child can be a rebellious because you have made some strict rules. You like discipline a lot but your child might feel frustrated because of these rules. We know, you love your child, you care about him but don’t make rules they want to break and become a rebellious child. Rules and regulations are good for them but so many rules can irritate them. Psychologist classifies rules into late goings. Fixed and firm rules. Fixed rules are those on which you can never think of compromising like rules related to health and safety, rules on family issues. Flexible rules can be changed according to need and time. For example, going to a party with friends, watching TV late at night, etc.


Explain why -- The biggest mistake we do is we did not tell our children why this rule is made and why they have to follow. As a result, they will keep nagging and start doing things at your back or even lying. Don't say follow it because I say so give them reasons. Be clear of your rules and expectations and consult a counselor for any help.

2) Communication - If you feel his behavior is changing for the past few days and he gets angry, irritated even on small issues then communication is a big and effective tool to solve this issue. Ask them about the matter as a friend and don’t judge them if they say your feelings to you.

3) Patience – Every parent must not lose his cool when his child doesn’t want to listen to him and want to do all the activities he wants. Here, I want to say one thing that don't lose your patience. Try to understand his feelings, thoughts, and why he wants to do that particular thing. 

4) Get him checked to a counselor/ psychologist - If you see the symptoms of stress, anxiety, depression in them then be a responsible parent and get them checked to a professional doctor. Anxiety, depression is curable.

5) Try to understand that it is a natural phenomena – If they are getting closer to their friends, if they are getting concerned about their appearance more than before, then stop taunting them. It is natural that they started feeling more connected to their friends.

If you try to understand your child, slowly you will start noticing that some positive changes are happening to him. Your child also started to change his rebellious nature to a calm, understanding child. Slowly, he will start sharing all his feelings and emotions with you. 

If you need any kind of help for making rules for your children, consult our Counselors or Psychologists online or by booking an appointment at or you can contact on 9050232637. We are always here to help you!

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    Tanishka Pathak

    Counselor, Counseling Psychologist

    Location: N/A

    Language: English, Hindi

    Area Of Expertise: Child Counseling, Couple Counseling, Marriage Counseling, Adolescent Counselling, Mental Health, Family Counseling

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