Do you think that you are overly nice to the people around you, doing as they want, working to please them, and at some point in time, you feel that you are being taken for granted and used? What is this personality that makes you all nice to the people around you or some specific people?

In this article, we will be dealing with what is nice guy syndrome, that is, what is the personality where a person is all nice to people around them and learn about the causes of nice guy syndrome, along with its symptoms and how you can deal with such personality. So let's start with understanding the nice guy syndrome.

What Is Nice Guy Syndrome?

Nice guy syndrome refers to the personality that a person adopts where they try to be the nicest person one will ever meet. People with this syndrome exhibit behavior such as trying to do all the other people want, making sure that their actions do not hurt others, going opposite of their personality just to please others and many more. This is what is nice guy syndrome.

In relationships, people usually exhibit this behavior when they are in too much love or attraction, because of which they are usually taken for granted, and this makes them question: is loving someone too much right? It is essential to understand that you must be yourself and do what you are rather than trying to be the nice guy. Let's understand what are some of the signs of people having nice guy syndrome.

Symptoms Of Nice Guy Syndrome

It is necessary that you can recognise the nice guy syndrome signs so that you can help yourself and even the people near you who are suffering from this problem so that they are not used. The signs are:

1. You Often Neglect Your Desires

One of the symptoms of nice guy syndrome is that you often neglect your desires and wishes. For example, if you want to go to a beach while others want to go to a mountain, you suppress your desire in this case, and this does not happen once but every time where he suppresses your desires and opinions so that others don't get disappointed no matter how disappointed you feel.

2. Trying To Be The Giver In Relationship

Trying to be the given in a relationship is also one of the nice guy syndrome signs. You always try to fulfill what your partner asks you even if you are not able to do it. You always fulfill all their demands and try to be the one who gives in everything despite your efforts not being reciprocated. This is one of the nice guy syndrome in relationships where you try to be the one who takes all the responsibility and makes the relationship work.

3. You Don’t Stand Up For Yourself

Also one of the other signs that you have nice guys syndrome is that you don't stand up for yourself. You have a fear of speaking for yourself or don't give your opinions. Even in discussions, you tend to suppress your opinions and thoughts while listening to what others have to say, even if they are wrong. Knowing how to reduce the fear of communication in a relationship is one way to deal with it.

4. Making Yourself Available Always And Not Saying NO

Among the various nice guy syndrome signs, one of the signs is that you always make yourself available and never say no to anyone. Even if you are busy with a lot of work but still if someone asks for your help you're always available to them and never say no. The nice guy syndrome in relationships is that you reply to all the messages instantly and are always ready to hang out with them despite being busy.

5. Ignore The Mistakes Made By The Other Person

Another of the nice guy syndrome signs is that you ignore the mistakes made by other people even if that is hurting you. You tend to forgive people easily and ignore their mistakes despite them being very wrong to you. This is one of the symptoms of nice guy syndrome, where you forgive others and ignore their mistakes just to be the nice guy for people around you and to not hurt them even if they have hurt you.

What Causes Nice Guy Syndrome?

Now that you know what are some of the symptoms of people suffering from nice guy syndrome, aren't you wondering what are the causes of nice guy syndrome? These are:

1. You Have Fear Of Rejection

Want to know what causes nice guy syndrome? One of the reasons people suffer from nice guys syndrome is that they have the fear of rejection in them. Often, when people cannot accept criticism and think that they do not belong somewhere, they end up developing the fear of being rejected by people and discarded by them, and this is why they adopt the nice guy personality so that people are always happy because of them. They also start reflecting on the nice guy syndrome in relationships due to the fear of being rejected by their partner. They agree to do all the things they think a nice guy does so that their partner does not reject them.

2. Wanting To Please Everybody

One of the causes of nice guy syndrome is that they have this mentality that they need to please everybody. We often want to have the validation of others. Things that people reject and do not validate make us think that we are going wrong or we aren't enough. This evening for validation makes us habituated to the thinking that we must please everybody, and because of this, we often adopt what is nice guy syndrome or nice guy personality. We try to be as people want us to be, being all nice to them, doing the work and not making them angry or displeased so that they are always pleased by us and remain in their good books.

3. Your Self-confidence Is Very Low

There are many reasons as to what causes nice guy syndrome, one of them is that we have very low self-confidence. Usually, the nice guy syndrome is because we don't find ourselves enough or are confident in ourselves. The poor level of self-confidence makes us doubt everything, and we think that we aren't good enough for people around us. This is why you often try to be the nice guy so that people notice you and you can validate yourself by what they say about you. In such cases, seeking self-confidence counseling can help you a lot so that you can boost your confidence and maintain your self-esteem.

4. To Keep People By Your Side

Often the desire to keep people by our side and never let them go is what causes nice guy syndrome. Apart from the fear of rejection and being secluded or isolated we often don't want the people we love to leave our side. This makes us think that if we show them our real side, they will leave us, and due to this, we often adopt the nice guy mentality so that they always stay by our side. The desire to keep people by our side gives us this syndrome. This is what is nice guy syndrome, where you want to always be the one who is all good coming from a fantasy or a person who is perfect in every term and is desired.

5. Feeling The Responsibility Of Being Good

Feeling the responsibility of being good to people is also one of the causes of nice guy syndrome. Often when we talk to people we feel that we have the responsibility of being good to people. We take it as our burden to be the nice guy to everybody and this at times also hampers your relationship and can be one of the reasons why your girlfriend is not talking to you because you think that it is your responsibility to be good to everybody or your girlfriend every time which can make her feel inferior or not good to you. These are some of the reasons why you may suffer from nice guy syndrome which makes it necessary that you deal with it quickly.

How To Deal With Nice Guy Syndrome?

Just knowing about the symptoms and the causes of a syndrome is not enough. It is essential that you take the necessary steps to cure it. So, some of the tips to deal with nice guy syndrome are:

1. Make Sure You Keep Your Opinion

When you get to know what is nice guy syndrome, one thing that becomes clear is that people suffering from nice guys syndrome are in able to put forward their opinions. Maybe it is the fear of rejection, unacceptability or even the idea of not displeasing others that makes them reject their opinions and settle them back in their heart. One of the ways how to deal with nice guy syndrome is to keep all these fears aside and put forward your opinions. You must not think of what others will think but try to gradually make yourself heard by stating what is in your mind without fear and emphasizing your desires.

2. Set A Boundary For Others And Yourself

There are various tips to deal with nice guy syndrome, one of them is making sure to set boundaries for others and even yourself. You should set up a boundary line for people so that they can't cross that line and suppress you. Don't allow people to cross the line and hurt you, and even for yourself, you must not cross the boundary line and go beyond what you are supposed to do. You should learn how to stop caring about people so that you are not much affected by them. Don't always be ready to help people and let them use you even if it is your relationship or close people. Allow yourself a space that is completely yours where you are not used.

3. Give Away The Provider/Giver Personality

Are you having the nice guy syndrome in relationships? Are you the one who is always the provider or giver in a relationship? For example, you never say no to your girlfriend even if the things that she demands are beyond your capabilities. Do you always fulfill all the demands made by the people? This is what you must let go of. To know how to deal with nice guy syndrome, it is important that you leave this provider personality and start saying no to things that are not necessary for you to buy or give, be it any relationship. You don't have to fulfill all the unnecessary demands made by people and get used by people.

4. Don’t Be Available Always

One of the tips to deal with nice guy syndrome is to stop being available to people all the time. Are you always answering your phone within minutes or seconds and even replying to messages quickly as soon as you see it? You may think that it is about being nice to them and not making them wait, but other people find you always free and start taking you for granted. This is one of the symptoms of nice guy syndrome and you must stop making yourself always available to them. Tell them that you are busy and only do their work or be available when you are genuinely free or they are in urgent need.

5. Recognize Your Worth And Respect Yourself

People who have nice guy syndrome usually start hating themselves if they are not able to be nice to people and instead hurt them. You should know how to stop hating yourself as there is nothing wrong in thinking about yourself and not always being nice to people if they are not nice to you. This is how to deal with nice guy syndrome. You must recognise your self-worth and respect yourself because unless you don't respect yourself, people around you will not respect you. Start prioritizing your needs and loving yourself. Don't allow people to respect you because you're always ready to help them.

6. Talk To A Counselor

Often, when you suffer from a nice guy personality or syndrome, you end up exhausting yourself and suppressing your desires, which can lead to stress and mental exhaustion. At times it even harms your relationship and causes you a lot of psychological issues. One of the tips to deal with nice guy syndrome is going to a counselor. If you are unable to deal with the nice guy's syndrome, you must seek a therapist. Also if you think your relationship is being hampered you can go for relationship counseling. This will help you to manage and find a cure for your syndrome as well as maintain your relationship.

Conclusion

The article dealt with what is nice guy syndrome, which means when people go the opposite of their personality and try to be extra nice to people around them. Usually, people who have a fear of rejection, want to keep people by their side, do not acknowledge their self-worth, and have the habit of pleasing everybody suffer from this syndrome. It causes them to exhibit behavior such as trying to please everybody, always being available and never saying no, hurting themselves to please others and many more.

This often leads them to anxiety and exhaustion and knowing how to overcome mental exhaustion is important for them so that they don't end up losing themselves. Taking the help of a therapist, prioritizing your needs, acknowledging your worth, and not caring about others’ opinions will help you to overcome this syndrome. Always remember that you should present yourself as you are leaving all the filters aside.

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